why the Listen Lady? a question, with a fairly nerdy answer. in the Simpsons episode 'in marge we trust', Rev. Lovejoy looses his love and joy for the church. to help fill in, Marge starts working at the church as the Listen Lady, taking the calls of distressed congregants.
after having been in the christian church for several years, i left completely alienated and annoyed. i went into it not wanting to believe that they were the clicky, hyprocrital, legalistic caricature i was taught to avoid by my semi-catholic mother and non-religious, yet spirtual, father. however, when you are head-over-heels for something, you don't realize that you are wearing blinders.
so what made me leave? long story. shorter version: conservatives, (and that is coming from a Former conservative). not all conservatives, about 4% of them are pretty decent people. they actually act Christ like. they love immensly, give more than they have. they listen and love reguardless of the horrible and boring dribble that comes out of your mouth. they are out there. though, if you want to find them, i suggest starting to overturn rocks and dredge rivers. i became a christian because of a couple just like this. they loved me even though i mocked, questioned and judged their faith. (oh yeah, i spent a good amount of my teenage years as a in-your-face atheist. Though, who didnt?). after a long time, their pure and loving ways made me want to be a better person, it restored my faith in god and people in general. and that's when it happened... i thought all christians were like them. yes, you can laugh out loud, it's okay. (for the people with their head so far up their pastor's ass, that are not laughing: step one - remove head from ass. step two - learn to laugh at yourself. if you can't, you're screwed the real world.)
So i entered into this church with a overly optimistic attitude. i wanted to immerse myself completely in what i thought would be a welcoming and nourishing community. however, it was like a bad relationship. everything seems fine for awhile. in fact, that person is everything you ever looked for, until, oh!, until small and puzzling incidents start popping up. you try ignore it over and over again. you keep turning the other cheeck. until, you turn that cheek so many times, you end up with whip lash, a neck brace, and a large hospital bill. then, the final straw. you realize that person will never change and you have no other choice, but to break it off. years later, when you drive past their neighborhood, you think, "dear god!, why did waste so much time with that person?!". maybe you laugh or cry, or do what i do best and let out a good deep annoyed breath.
so i walked away from that 'ex' with my eyes a little wider, mind a little opener, and heart a bit brokener. kinda of like when you realize that the american dream is, in fact, a dream. you start out with good intentions, but get lost somewhere along the way.
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